THE TROUBLE WITH YOUR MONEY

When you first start out in life, many people are afforded the opportunity of getting "everything they want". That's actually a pretty noble thing for a parent to want for their children, but how a person understands it and thinks of themselves drives exactly what those things will become in the future.
Consider for a minute that you are a very normal person. normal looks, normal resources and a normal, that is to say, average, degree of acceptance for what and who you are. And what you are to others is directly related to what you can provide in the way of self worth and how you project your desire to see other people happy by doing the same to them. So the day comes when you are given something that gives you just a little bit of an edge over someone else. Maybe its a dress, or a car, or a new pair of blue jeans. It doesn't really matter what it is, but how you perceive yourself with regards to this is VERY important. Because sometimes a nice thing is just that. A nice thing. And at others, a nice thing becomes something that you use to cover up something you don't like about yourself in the first place. Its a panacea. A short term band aid over something your not exactly comfortable with. Sometimes it directly changes what it was you didn't think others liked. Maybe you were a blond and found that the boy you liked preferred redheads. So you changed it, and things went along. Other times we use things that are NOT associated with the original problem. Lets say you felt bad about the color of your hair, but you got a car instead. So now you may have blonde hair, but hey....you have a car instead. In any case, we are conditioned to feel certain ways about ourselves with regards to what it is we have around us. And when a person gets slowly mired into the collection of things at the expense of self worth, what results is a never ending cycle of feeling bad, covering it up with something that we hope distracts others from the supposed failure, and then driving on. But this is a domino effect combined with a snowball that gains speed and size as you get older. Each insult to a person internally become a desire or a need to find another way to cover it up....or distract others from seeing what you cant address. While you are young, this behavior nurtures a seed that grows without you even knowing it. It settles deep and slowly grows inside all the while you are trying to find a better car, bigger boobs, nicer hair, or anything else that can detract from the feeling of lowered self worth while still maintaining what you want others to see. And whether or not they see it, it continues to grow inside of you. The low self image stays low, and the harder you work to maintain it, the more readily age and time require more and more to maintain it. Ever wonder why a midlife crisis hits in the middle of your life? Because that's when most people finally tip the scale and realize that all this time they have been covering over things and feelings of lowered self worth with objects and possessions that they are no longer capable of getting, or are no longer performing the desired effect to others. The downward spiral tightens and rather than look constructively at the base problem, simply attribute it to a failure in themselves to be able to achieve it.
The worst part of this is that others seem to be so readily willing to accept the desire of these things as frivolities rather than the only thing that is keeping them sane. Because to have these things disappear without something to fill the void is to reject the ONLY thing they have used as comfort for their entire lives. And the people who got you here would like nothing better than to have you feel like that is the only solution.
So here they sit taking a look at what they are not, or do not feel of themselves, and feeling as though there is no possible way that they could be anything else. Walk away from the security blanket, regardless of its obvious unreality, is impossible. So the requirements to uphold it become larger...and larger....and larger. I would think that if a person who has everything in the world realizes that they feel miserable, would also realize that there will never be enough money in the world to satisfy the depths of their own emotional despair. Money does not buy all things. It only buys things until you can no longer afford them. and money does not buy happiness either. It simply pacifies the need for it until the price is too high to pay for NOT having it.
I am often baffled by how so many people look at my life and shake their heads as though I simply don't make enough money to be considered successful. And I turn on my heel and often ask them what it is that they purchase with this level of success. For those of you who know me, ask yourself if you believe I live with any less of a standard of living than you, regardless of how much you make. Do you see me living in a house ANY smaller than you? With less automobiles, or clothing, or savings? Any less in the way of retirement? Do you see my child with any less toys or prospects for the future? Ever seen him NOT go to the doctor or the dentist or the emergency room? Compare what you MAKE to what you OWE. This is your income to debt ratio. And while many people can say they make more money than I do, it means nothing in the grand scheme of things when I walk away at the end of the month accomplishing the same or MORE than people with two and three times the paychecks swamped in debt. Money is not the end all. Money is the TOOL that you use to get the goal. I wield that tool far better than people give me credit for, and exact the SAME standard of living by being able to balance what it is that I want and need with the ability and effort to find it.
You have a 1800 square foot house with a $2000 dollar mortgage. I have a 4400 square foot house with a $600 dollar mortgage. How did I do that? I bought a house worth more than it was purchased for, and used what I saved to repair it AND make additional payments to the mortgage. When you looked at your mortgage and said "I can afford that" the mortgage lender knew you'd only "afford" it for 30 years. He didn't give a SHIT whether you would have to fight and scrabble for every penny or that you'd ever be able to pay it off. As a matter of fact, it was in his best interest to have you NEVER pay it off. Next time you purchase a house, look at what you WANT and need, and then go looking for that. Not looking at what you can afford and regretting all the extra space you haven't got the time to enjoy.
You have two cars, and I have two cars. Mine are a 4 cylinder and a 6 cylinder. They AVERAGE 28 miles to the gallon. I go the same number of miles that you travel, but at the end of the month I have a fuel bill that is two-thirds less than what is normally expended while driving the same number of miles at the same speed with no less space in the vehicle. Sure, I suppose you paid for the ability to look successful in a large automobile, but have YOU ever given notice to someone else s vehicle THAT much? Is it REALLY worth it to go that extra suffering of financing a car for the opinion of someone who doesn't give a shit about you anyway?
Here's a little trick I should offer to you. When you bought your car, he asked you what day you wanted to pay on. Tell him the 16th of the month. THEN , pay one payment in advance and pay the rest on the first of every month. Because your interest is calculated monthly, and you paid it 14 days early. So take that 8% interest and half it.
Want another? The warranty package you bought on your car added as much as $3000 dollars to the price of your car. But if you went online to the SAME company he went to in the back room while you sucked on his free coffee and doughnuts, you would have found the warranty online for 350 dollars. It is the EXACT same warranty. Same company, same vehicle. So what did you get for $2650 dollars? Would you believe a cup of coffee and a doughnut? People often wonder why I am living in this little piss hole town when I could be making so much more money. But to be quite honest, how much would you pay to live in a place that had what I do here? I have lakes and rivers and waterfalls, safe streets, a nice school system, every amenity I could ever want or need, and within driving distance of any place I would want to go. A major international airport within an hour, another country to visit if I wish, one of the worlds most famous cities and all of it in a rural setting people scream for their entire lives. So how much would you pay for it? To many people, it is not beyond their thinking to say that they would pay the lion's share of their income JUST to live where they want. So should it be any grand stretch of the imagination to understand that NOT earning it and living here just the same is just as logical. Instead of looking at me as ONLY earning 32,000 a year, look at me as earning 60,000 and paying for what I have already. You PAY to go to Vegas to gamble. I drive an hour to gamble just the same. I do, by the way gamble only nickels. You want to ski in Lake Placid? You PAY to fly here. I drive an hour. You want to spend a night in Manhattan? Then PAY to fly here. I drive. You want to camp in a rustic cabin in the Adirondacks? PAY to fly here. I drive there in an hour.
Everyone I know has a cell phone. And yours has ALL the amenities on it that makes it JUST the phone to have. But quite honestly, and once again, have you ever given a SHIT about what someone else had to their ear? I sure as hell don't. Go look at your cell phone bill and tell me what it is. If it is less than the 60 dollars I paid for ALL THREE of mine with the same services, I will EAT IT.
Are you saving any for retirement? If you are paying for all of these other things by a hand to mouth mentality, robbing Peter to pay Paul, I will bet that you haven't got near as much to play with at the end of the month as you intended to. MOST I would assume is going to pay off the debts incurred by an overuse of credit. A credit I refuse to use because it has the same distorted logic as a mortgage. That people have you reason that you only need to afford the BILL, not what was put on the credit, is an abomination. I am sure you have all seen me use a credit card for exactly the same purchases you would use them for, but debiting an account is not the same as credit, and at the end of the month you are paying even more of your money for the privilege of borrowing what you didn't have in the first place. And all for the greedy pocket of someone who thought that by making you feel successful for having the ability somehow cost you less. I have been told that when I go out, that I am very well dressed and have never looked out of place with what I wear. I can have exactly what I need to do what it is we have chosen to do in a way that LOOKS like more than its worth. And wasn't that your intention in the first place? To LOOK the part? Well guess what? I did it with a third of the money and NEVER ONCE had a person look to the price tags on my clothes. They DID ask me which store I bought it from,though , and went about naming top of the line stores. Which tells me that NONE of these people really even KNOW that the same clothes are two-thirds less anywhere else.
I am often STUNNED by the amount of money spent on food. Yes, it is true that food is a necessity, but food is something that has been processed and packaged to save time more than it is money. So if you are enjoying the time you cook as something done as entertainment, rather than an exercise in time management, you may find that your food budget goes DOWN and so does your entertainment budget. Learn to cook with the best you can buy, and you will be surprised at how much better you feel by knowing you had a healthy meal and STILL paying less. MOST people wouldn't know the difference between a 37 cent can of cola and a Pepsi when you put it in front of them, so why the hell waste MORE of your money on someone who hasn't got enough of an interest to CARE in the first place? My son will go to college and will not incur a student loan debt. He can go to the college of his choice and that money has been put aside. He has a fund for his first car, and in the event that I am hit by a milk truck, will be taken care of with life insurance. Any different from your child?
I am often ...almost scared at the commercials where people plan for their 'Golden Years'. These overly exaggerated claims that you are planning for a future that never comes. They show pictures of elderly people walking on a beach next to an RV with the sun going down on their day like it does on their lives. But lets be honest. How many people do you know EVER put and end point to the savings, and instead worked their gnarled fingers to the bone right up until the day they died? Do you think the man who slid the pretty portfolio across the desk with a charming gleam in his eye gave a shit from month to month as he collected his earnings from your work? To him, you are no more then the money spent on a utility bill, and he does the same thing with every other person. When you die, with all of your labors amassed into a fund, he will simply close the account, write a check to your next of kin, and make an appointment for the next young couple willing to fall for the same bullshit lines. Planning for your future is only good if you PLAN on having the future you expected. But pouring that money you COULD have enjoyed your life, with only to have a check written to someone else, is a wasted life.
My utilities in my house are just as functional as yours, and cost me two-thirds less by living in a town with it's own hydroelectric power. I switched my lights to fluorescent bulbs and saved 58 dollars PER LIGHT per year. How do I save so much? I turned off the DAMNED lights. One of the most asinine behaviors of American culture is the absolute necessity to believe they need to be successful without knowing one God Damned thing about how to go about it. As though throwing it in the air to the first person who says what they purchase or use will make them look better, is the one who should have it. That what you want or need is worth paying for the time you save by not doing it yourself. All the while not valuing the time in the first place. Time IS money, but its YOUR time and it's YOUR money.
Making money is one thing. But knowing the USE of money is another entirely. Being successful in the world has just as much to do with realizing that everyone under the sun will do their damnedest to make you feel like they are doing you a favor while fucking you out of something that can be had elsewhere for less. Every service that offers you something should come with a mantra that says "What's in it for this guy if it's such a deal for me?" Because when you see that, you will realize that the whole exercise is just smoke and nonsense to get more out of you than he puts into it. Capitalism is a free market economy, and succeeding in it is not simply buying the top of the line. Its finding the top of the line from the person who is willing to offer it with the lowest profit margin.
It's all nickels and dimes people. You may look at it as thousands or tens of thousands, but it's all just nickels and dimes. And I hate to say it, but most of you are being "nickeled and dimed" to DEATH. So don't look at me with that pity that implies that I don't make it in the world. I don't count money. I make money COUNT. Sure, I'd love to be able to put away even more money, but to be quite honest, I would be working twice as hard and enjoying my life less for it. Work to live, don't live to work. And above everything else, realize that everything that you have can be made better by simply investing a little bit of TIME into it yourself. You gain an appreciation for it's value TO YOU. Anything that is simply purchased and ignored isn't worth it in the first place. That should apply to houses, and cars, and retirement funds....even people. Time counts, and keeps counting. Might as well make you money count for the time.